The following is a panel from the Saint Edmund Campion Children’s Missal, published in 1954.
Let’s consider some of the following items. If you are a modern, post-Vatican II Catholic:
- Do you have a crucifix above your bed? Probably not.
- Were you or your family actually planning on going to Mass? Fairly low chance.
- Did your mom actually think you were up? No. Of course not.
- Did your mom say “you’ll be late for Mass?” No. She said “hurry, we’re already late for Mass.”
- Do you say “huh?” to your mom? No. You whine “whaaaat?! I’m trying to sleep!”
- Does your mom dress this nice? No. And your dad dresses even worse. We live in a slob culture, so jeans and a team jersey will do just fine for Mass. In fact, why doesn’t she assume you can just go in your pajamas? Right?
- Does your mom suggest you go to a later Mass. No. You’ve got a soccer game later, so you couldn’t even if she thought you should which, in fact, she does not.
- Do you say “okay” to your mom’s command to go to a later Mass? No. In fact you throw a fit and argue.
Well, it looks like Bobby did make it to Mass after all.
Oops, stand up Bobby, put your tongue back in your mouth, and hold out your hand.